Rian Malan’s book My Traitor’s Heart about South Africa is a towering classic.

It describes in a raw way which much rattled ‘liberal’ opinion at the time just how African and ‘other’ most of South Africa in fact is, and just how unimaginably and painfully far ‘whites’ have to go to be accepted there.

I met Rian while I was based in Pretoria soon after his book came out. I also visited Creina Alcock, a South African of European descent who had renounced white South Africa and ended up living in a small hut in deepest Msinga in Zululand, as described in his book. An astounding real-life story.

Anyway, Rian is still in business. This wonderful piece describes how the two Alcock boys and their amazing fluency in Zulu are carving out a lively and successful role for themselves in the hurly-burly and very African New South Africa.

Read it to the end:

For GG, just visiting the supermarket can turn into an extraordinary experience.

Picture this: you’re in a shopping mall in northern Jo’burg. African ladies man a line of tills. They’re chatting in Zulu. A young white man reaches the head of the queue, laden with groceries. One of the ladies says, in Zulu, ‘Look at the hair on this one’s arms. It’s a baboon, I tell you.’ Her friends titter. The white man says nothing. He’s writing a cheque. He rips it out, hands it over. He says, ‘Ever see a baboon write a cheque?’

The till lady freezes. She says, ‘Oh God. Sorry, boss.’ The white man laughs and says, ‘Sengi suke kwi mfene ngaya kubasi?’ – so I’ve gone from baboon to boss, eh? This is getting seriously weird; his skin is white, but the sounds emerging from his mouth are African. The till lady shrieks, claps a hand over her mouth, runs and hides behind a pillar.

By now, the rest of the till ladies are convulsed with merriment, and the entire supermarket is paralysed. A supervisor appears, apologising profusely. GG says, ‘I think it’s funny.’ The guilty till lady is coaxed back to her post and finishes the transaction amid gales of laughter and ribald African banter. GG gathers his groceries and waves goodbye.

As he leaves, the entire staff give him a standing ovation.